I am an avid traveller who likes visiting different destinations for their beautiful culture and delicious food. But there’s one downside when you are the only traveller in your social circle: you become the designated "courier service".

You see, I travel a lot, and every time I go somewhere, my friends would ask me to buy them local products, especially those that are hard to find. Don’t get me wrong— I love my friends, but there is a limit to how much shopping I can do on their behalf.

One of the most frustrating experiences I had was when I was travelling to South Korea on my own. As expected, my friends started to bombard me with shopping requests, such as skincare, makeup, discounted bags, and more.Unable to fight my people-pleasing nature, I wrote down every request and promised to get it all for them as soon as I reached South Korea.

Although completing the shopping list wasn’t the most difficult task, thanks to the country’s vibrant shopping centres, I still ended up spending a significant portion of my holiday tracking down all the items for them.However, the biggest issue arose when I was packing my bags to return home. After stuffing everything into my luggage, I realised that there was a good chance that my bags would exceed the weight limit, despite paying for extra baggage. And sure enough, I was right. I ended up having to pay an extra $100 because my bag exceeded my allocated weight limit by 5kg.

I was frustrated because I had to pay more for weight that was not even carrying my items. Afterward, I did ask my friends to pay for the baggage fee, but I couldn’t help but feel guilty for asking. That was when I made a promise to myself to set limits on the shopping favours I could fulfil, so I wouldn’t overwhelm myself, especially during my hard-earned trips.I believe that treating people with kindness will lead them to treat you with kindness in return. However, I’ve also learnt that saying "no" is also an act of kindness— to yourself.

This article is part of TSS Confessions, a weekly column where we delve into personal finance topics that are unscripted and genuine real accounts from people.

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Wai Kaye